Everlasting Friend
by CarpeDiem75
Summary: Songfic based on Blue October's Everlasting Friend & Chameleon Boy. GSR. Spoilers for Leaving Las Vegas. Chap 1, 2 and 3 written prior to air of LLV. Please read and review. Chap 4, 5 and6 added 0107. I probably got a little carried away, but oh well
1. Chapter 1

A/N: I don't own CSI or the characters. I also don't own anything written or performed by Blue October. If you get a chance, listen to their CD called Foiled. I highly recommend it. Please read and review.

She found him sitting on the uncomfortable, blue seats outside the gate of United flight 1554. The row of chairs backed up to the typical expanse of the airport windows. Grissom's body was half-turned so he could capably peer into the world outside the glass. His facial expression was both wistful and unfocused. Nothing specific seemed to hold his gaze.

Thankful her credentials allowed her access to the gate without a boarding pass, Sara made her way toward Grissom. Not speaking, she sat on the empty chair beside him, intertwining his hand in hers and resting her head upon his shoulder. They sat in silence for more than a half-hour and through two boarding calls. Sensing final boarding was imminent, Grissom stood, not breaking his hand hold with Sara. She stood as well forcefully biting into her bottom lip in hope her tears would remain at bay. A rouge drop slid down her right cheek. Grissom gently brushed it from her face. His own eyes were watery. Reaching into her jacket pocket, Sara retrieved a neatly wrapped package, handing it to Grissom. He looked at her quizzically, but before he could question, the cackle of the intercom sounded in the background. Sara managed a half-hearted smile and squeezed his hand as if to signal a silent goodbye. She took a step backward. Instead of breaking her grasp, Grissom stepped to follow her retreat. Sara squeezed his hand again and let go. She turned and walked away, leaving Grissom to stare after her.

Twenty minutes later, Sara was in her car driving to the lab. Given the two had barely spoken since Grissom revealed he accepted an offer to teach a four-week entomology seminar in the Northeast, Sara was conflicted about seeing him off from the airport. It was difficult, but she remained until the plane was in flight. Once she was reasonably sure he was aboard, she returned to the windows, crying as space was created between the plane's landing gear and the solid surface of the runway.

It was 11:35. Her shift began in just over twenty minutes. The drive would absorb much of this time. Stopping at a red light, Sara reflected upon Grissom's departure. He told her of the upcoming trip seven days ago, only one day before her colleagues were informed. Detecting her surprise and disappointment, Grissom attempted to say all of the right things.

"_I need a break from work, not you."_

"_Our relationship is strong enough to survive a brief respite."_

"_I wish the offer had come from somewhere closer to Vegas."_

His words, however sensible, fell flat. Unable to verbalize her emotions, Sara avoided both her feelings and Grissom. The two exchanged few words in the days before today and slept separately at their respective residences.

Last night, as she and Greg were analyzing evidence collected from a scene, Sara listened intently to the music he chose for the evening. It was tame by his standards, but Sara welcomed the diversion from conversation. She found herself enraptured by the lyrics of one particular song. Its present-day relevance was so profound, it was as if someone had crawled into her head and organized all of the disconnected thoughts bouncing around the inside of her brain. Borrowing the CD from Greg, Sara had listened to nothing else during the past 24 hours. The light now green, Sara continued her journey toward the lab, reaching over to turn the volume up on track 12. She wondered if he was listening as well.


	2. Chapter 2

Grissom was carefully unwrapping the gift from Sara when the plane began its reverse from the gate. Inside he found an Ipod and a handwritten note.

_Gil,_

_This song explains how I am feeling better than I ever could. Please listen. Enjoy your trip. I will miss you. _

_Love,_

Sara 

Grissom's heart was caught in his throat as he placed the earbuds in his ears and pressed play.

A heartbeat skip, relationship  
Inside a bubble bath  
An icing drip below your lip  
So we undo the math  
A sudden slip between  
My pathetic sedatives  
A real-life script of how  
Mistakes became our medicine, so

Delay the hurtful words  
Of complicated overcast  
Please take the message that i'm  
Picking up my chin at last  
I said my confidence  
It gets stronger when you're next to me  
But we pray from miles away  
In quest for what we long to be

I might crumble, I might take a fall again  
(still missing you)  
I might crumble, I might take a fall again  
(still missing you)  
I might crumble, I might take a fall again  
But you're my everlasting friend  
Everlasting friend

A heartbeat skip, relationship  
So we would stay up late  
A teardrop drip below your lip  
Beside the airport gate  
A sudden slip from where  
We used to be a year ago  
A real-life script of how  
Our hands would hold and not let go

But delay the mournful words  
Of complicated overcast  
Please take the message  
That you taught me how to live at last  
But i said my confidence  
It gets stronger when you're next to me  
But we wave respect goodbye  
In quest for what we long to be, but

I might crumble, I might take a fall again  
(still missing you)  
I might crumble, I might take a fall again  
(still missing you)  
I might crumble, I might take a fall again  
But you're my everlasting friend

Will you be coming home?  
(everlasting friend)  
My everlasting friend, will you be coming home?  
(everlasting friend)

I might crumble, I might take a fall again  
(still missing you)  
I might crumble, I might take a fall again  
(still missing you)  
I might crumble, I might take a fall again

I might crumble, I might take a fall again  
I might crumble, I might take a fall again  
I might crumble, I might take a fall again  
I might crumble, I might take a fall again  
I just want to know that you'll be coming home  
I just want to know that you'll be coming home  
I just want to know that you'll be coming home  
I just want to know that you'll be coming home

An hour into the flight, Grissom had listened to the song ten times. The genre was a bit modern for his taste, but he found the lyrics mesmerizing. Based on the accompanying note, the words of the song also held intense meaning to Sara. With each listen, Grissom attempted to dissect its message.

Relationship inside a bubble bath… 

To Grissom, the warmth and intimacy of a bubble bath mirrored the warmth and intimacy of his relationship with Sara. While the friendship of their past had been volatile, their friendship of the present was calm, or it had been until this week. The risk had been well worth the reward and he frequently regretted not acting upon his feelings much sooner than a year and a half ago.

Grissom knew instantly he wished to accept the offer to teach at Williams College. Personally, his life was as perfect as it could be. Professionally, however, the symptoms of burnout were undeniable. Because of Sara, his personal and professional life was inseparable. The two rarely discussed work in their off hours. Science yes, but never cases. It was an unspoken pact they shared from the night of their first date. Both he and Sara seemed to sense the need to learn each other's non-work selves. Surprisingly, Grissom learned workaholic Sara had a number of outside interests. The better surprise was the overlap of her hobbies with some of his own. In recent weeks, Grissom struggled to the let the door close on the lab as he left work each day. Sara was an attentive listener and even more attentive at comforting him. Still, he missed the easy-going repartee they shared and expected Sara missed it as well.

Undo the math… 

One plus one no longer equals two. His biggest fear was losing Sara as a result of the trip. This fear was the sole reason Grissom waited so long to tell her about the teaching offer.

Mistakes became our medicine… 

Grissom danced around Sara for the better part of six years before channeling the courage to pursue a relationship. Shamefully, he remembered the countless times he did or said something to hurt her. It was a bitter pill they both swallowed to arrive where they were today. Sara's selfless ability to forgive allowed him to let go of the albatross of guilt he carried for the first few months of dating. He aspired not only to correct the mistakes he made years ago but avoid new mistakes as well. Clearly, Sara considered his leave of absence a mistake. Grissom recognized convincing her otherwise was a necessity for survival.

We pray from miles away in quest for what we long to be… 

This trip had little to do with spatial distance, but rather distance from duty. Grissom's desire to extricate himself from the death and despair permeating all facets of his daily life was in hope of recapturing the love he once had for his profession. A local teaching offer would have been equally well-received, a notion he unsuccessfully tried to communicate to Sara.

I might crumble, I might take a fall again… 

Sara was in love with him. She signed today's note with this fact. Self-preservation kept her from saying the words, but he could see it in her face and feel it in her touch. Even if she initiated the end of their relationship, it would destroy her. Grissom knew an end would definitely destroy him. Self-preservation also kept him from vocalizing his love for her. He could only hope she saw it in his face and felt it in his touch.

A teardrop drip below your lip outside the airport gate… 

The eerie similarity of this line of the song and the reality of an hour ago was not lost on him.

A sudden slip from where we used to be a year ago… 

The pain Sara emoted during the past several days made him nauseous. He had hurt her plenty outside of a relationship, but, until seven days ago, never inside one.

A real-life script of how our hands would hold and not let go… 

Sara's actions in the airport now seemed purposeful. She ultimately broke contact. He hoped the symbolism of this moment only manifested in his imagination.

You taught me how to live at last… 

So apropos. The last eighteen months had been the best of his life. Instead of life revolving around work, work had begun to revolve around life. Sara was now his pursuit of happiness. It was a role his work once played. Balancing the two was difficult, particularly because they were so diametrically opposed. Sara had become his life. Work was always about death.

We wave respect goodbye… 

His hesitation to tell Sara about the job offer and involve her in the decision showed a total lack of respect for their relationship. He readily acknowledged as much. Grissom anticipated Sara would feel his departure indicated she was an inadequate source of emotional support. Nothing could be further from the truth, but he was cognizant of his inability to explain the sabbatical was only loosely correlated to their relationship. The attitude adjustment was for her, not in spite of her.

Will you be coming home… 

This was her singular question. Grissom almost laughed. They shared the same fear. That they were over.

After listening to the song one final time, Grissom sighed and looked at his watch. He had a short layover in Chicago. Hopefully, he would have time to take care of the task at hand. He pulled a pen from the inside of his jacket pocket and began to write.


	3. Chapter 3

Sara climbed the steps to her apartment at about 8:30am. Leaving work on time was a welcome miracle. She was exhausted. Grissom's plane was scheduled to land in roughly an hour. He hadn't called during his layover and she was unsure he would make the effort to call when he landed.

She gasped in surprise at the sight of the plant on her doorstep. It was the same species Grissom sent her years ago. She knew it must be from him. Setting both the plant and keys on the entryway table, Sara carried the card to dining room table and sat down. She opened the envelope cautiously, almost fearful of its content. Sara began to read.

_Sara,_

_I liked your song very much, but I felt it was missing a verse. I dedicate the following to you._

_Love, Gil_

_A heartbeat skip, relationship_

_It bends, but never breaks._

_A tender kiss upon your lips_

_Always my breath you take._

_A sudden slip, but you_

_Forgive the tears I make you cry._

_A real-life script of how _

_My love for you will never die._

_Forget the lonely years_

_That complicate our painful past._

_Please take the message_

_That you taught me how to live at last._

_I said my confidence_

_It gets stronger when you're next to me._

_As one, joined in mind and heart_

_Is how we will forever be._

_You won't crumble, I won't let you fall again._

_(I'm missing you.)_

_You won't crumble, I won't let you fall again._

_(I'm missing you.)_

_You won't crumble, I won't let you fall again._

_I'm your everlasting friend._

_I will be coming home._

_Your everlasting friend, I will be coming home._

An hour later, Sara had read Grissom's note ten times. She went so far as to play the actual song, but sing the modified lyrics.

She answered the phone after its first ring.

"Hi," she said in a low voice.

"I wanted you to hear it from me, not just a note. I will be coming home. I am your everlasting friend."

"And I am yours," Sara replied.

"I love you."

"I love you too."


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: I felt inspired so I added a few more chapters. Again I borrowed and added to a Blue October song. Hope you enjoy. Please review and thanks for reading.

Unusually late, Sara rushed through the doors of the Las Vegas Crime Lab and walked briskly toward the conference room. She smiled to herself, knowing her colleagues would have difficulty believing she simply overslept. It was the truth. Working well beyond the official end of her last shift left Sara completely exhausted. Arriving at Grissom's townhouse a mere eight hours ago, she crawled into bed, so tired, she barely noticed the lack of warmth on the other side of the mattress. She succumbed to sleep almost immediately.

Grissom had been gone for a week. Foregoing her own apartment, Sara chose to sleep at his place, hoping she would, somehow, feel closer to him. They spoke frequently, but the phone calls did little to stem the loneliness. Solitude bred restlessness and work became her escape. The overtime finally cured her insomnia. Sara slept soundly, oblivious to the bedside alarm that sounded at half past ten. When she finally did wake, there were only thirty minutes to ready herself for work. Exiting the townhouse, she nearly tripped over the package that sat on the doorstep.

The mysterious package in tow, Sara reached the open door of the conference room, quickly noting its emptiness. Sighing, she advanced toward the office Catherine shared with the dayshift supervisor.

Finding her mulling paperwork, Sara knocked on the frame of the door. "Hey Catherine. Sorry I am late. I overslept."

"No problem," the interim supervisor stated. "It's a slow night. I sent the guys out on the only new case. I will let you know if anything else comes in."

Grissom's office had a lounge area hidden from view of passersby. In his absence, it had become Sara's secret hiding place. Like his townhouse, the sitting room was a place Sara felt nearer to him. She sat in his leather swivel chair. Giving the package her full attention, Sara realized it was from Grissom. She opened it carefully. It contained a handwritten note and the same Ipod she gave him at the airport. She began to read.

_Sara,_

_It is the weekend here and I am lonely for your company. Despite the cold, I found myself aimlessly wandering the streets of Williamstown. I happened by a music store and stopped in to warm by hands and browse the selection. I came across a Blue October CD. It reminded me of you, so I couldn't help but buy it. While it's not my taste, the lyrics of certain songs have unbelievable resonance. I know I did a poor job of explaining my need to accept the professorship. Giving you my heart was as terrifying as it was uplifting. I feel a profound openness with you. In recent months, the terrors of our job began to weigh on me. I felt myself retreating inward. I could not allow this to happen, which is why I decided to take leave. I can understand how my reasons would be confusing to you. Please listen to the song I put on the Ipod. Maybe you will find sense it its words._

_I love you._

_Gil_

Conscious of the privacy the room offered, Sara let the tears slide down her face. She leaned back in the chair and listened to the song.

_I changed my color for you_

_I shed my coat with caution_

_I lack the beauty you display_

_See here there are the bruises_

_And some were self-inflicted_

_And some showed up along the way_

_So I nod my head_

_I'm ready for the world to see_

_The secret I kept here inside the man you thought id be_

_Slip into coma calm_

_The coma where I calm myself down_

_Here comes excuses why I let you down_

_Stand by for another breakdown_

_Sound off the alarm_

_Is this the chameleon boy I swore I wouldn't become_

_Chameleon boy_

_Chameleon boy_

_So now we've come upon the hardest thing I've ever done_

_Its telling you that I'm a mess_

_What sort of mess I mean_

_Is self-destructive gasoline_

_The kind that strips you of your best_

_And while I play instead the way that most would end up dead_

_You sleep alone at home and wish that I was in our bed_

_With this I'm telling you_

_My color changes back to blue_

_How do I ask you this_

_Will you help me through_

_Stand by for another breakdown_

_Sound off the alarm_

_Is this the chameleon boy I swore I wouldn't become_

_Stand by for another breakdown_

_Sound off the alarm_

_Is this the chameleon boy I swore I wouldn't become_

_Chameleon boy_

_Chameleon boy_

_I try to think of all the people I look up to_

_Or growing up who would I be_

_Now the twisted part_

_Where'd all my idols end up_

_They all passed away_

_Passed away_

_Stand by_

_It's chameleon boy_

_Stand by_

_It's chameleon boy_

_Chameleon Boy_

_I'm chameleon boy..._

_Chameleon boy..._

Sara's silent tears gave way to noisy sobs before the song was complete. Minutes passed before she was able to regain control of her emotions. The desire to talk to him was overwhelming, but Sara resisted, knowing it was barely 3am on the East Coast and Grissom was likely asleep. Inspired, Sara wiped the last of the tears from her eyes and left the confines of Grissom's office in search of an unoccupied computer.


	5. Chapter 5

Freshly showered and dressed, Grissom poured himself a steaming cup of coffee. Sitting in front of the computer, he was pleasantly surprised to see a message from Sara.

_Gil,_

_I felt this song also lacked a final verse. I wait with bated breath until you return._

_Love,  
Sara_

_You changed your color for me,_

_You risked a cold rejection,_

_You put your heart out on display._

_I see beyond your bruises,_

_My touch now unrestricted,_

_I long to kiss them all away._

_So I nod my head,_

_I'm ready for the world to see,_

_The happiness I feel when you admit your need for me._

_Its time for quiet calm,_

_The quiet when I calm the sad blue,_

_Here come the reasons why I'll help you through._

_Stand clear of another breakdown,_

_Turn off the alarm._

_You are the chameleon boy I swear I will always love._

_Chameleon boy._

_I love chameleon boy._

Grissom was a naturally quiet man, but Sara had a way of leaving him speechless.


	6. Chapter 6

Sara deplaned US Airways Flight 90. It was a short flight from Las Vegas to Denver, but one filled with enormous anticipation. Grissom convinced her to take the weekend off and meet him here. No further details were provided. It was the last weekend before he returned to work at the lab. She searched the crowd for his familiar face until she settled upon a gentleman holding a sign with her name. She approached him hesitantly.

"Ms. Sidle?" He presumed.

"Yes."

"Dr. Grissom requests you allow me to drive you to him."

Curious, Sara followed the man towards a waiting limousine. She had hoped to be wrapping her long arms around Grissom by this point, but was willing to play along.

It was nearly 7:00pm when the car stopped in front of the Ogden Theater. The driver opened the door, revealing Grissom standing on the sidewalk. Even casually dressed in jeans, sweater and coat, he took her breath away.

Grissom pulled her into his arms and they stood in a quiet, yet emotional embrace for what seemed like an eternity. He sought her lips and what was, at first chaste, quickly turned passionate. No longer the sole occupants of the sidewalk, they broke contact.

Sara spoke first. "Where are we?"

Unable to disguise a mischievous grin, Grissom replied, "You'll see."

Taking Sara by the hand, he led her into the building. It was crowded and dimly lit. The majority of the patrons were far younger than the two of them. Grissom continued to pull on her hand until they reached the front of the stage. Sara wasn't completely sure, but he seemed to give a nod of acknowledgement to one of the crewmembers. Grissom placed his hands on her hips and moved her in front of him so her back was against his chest. His hands were clasped protectively around her waist and his head on her shoulder next to her ear. Sara finally determined they were at a concert. Cheers erupted as the lights dimmed further and the band took the stage. A single spotlight illuminated two barstools and two microphones.

Taking his place directly in front of Grissom and Sara, the singer spoke, "Usually we start a show with a little more energy, but tonight we thought we would slow things down a little."

One of the singer's band mates sat beside him, lifting an acoustic guitar to his knee.

The singer continued, "These first two songs are dedicated to our new friends Gil and Sara."

The two began an acoustic version of Everlasting Friend. The crowd sang along until the band reached a verse only known to Grissom and Sara. Grissom felt Sara's intake of breath. They swayed together in time with the music singing the lyrics written by Grissom. When the band began to play Chameleon Boy, Grissom felt Sara's fallen teardrops on his hands. As the song reached the words Sara had written, she turned to face him.

"How did you do this?"

"For once, my dear Sara, it's not the how, it's the why. I love you."


End file.
